  My daughter and I went to see the Spring Turnout in the beautiful Creston Valley this past weekend. I was not sure what to expect, as this was the first time that I had experienced the releasing of the cows. After a long winter of being cooped up, for both myself and of course the cows, this was a great experience. From the Kootenay Meadows Facebook page: Get ready to hoof it to the most udderly fantastic event in the Creston Valley! Spring Turnout 2024 is coming up this Saturday, April 20th, at Kootenay Meadows, and it’s going to be a pasture party like no udder! Prepare to be amazed as the cows kick up their heels and frolic in the fields after a long winter indoors. It’s a moooving experience you won’t want to miss! I had heard people talking about the previous year's Spring Turnout and the experience seemed to be consistent, it's "heart-warming". Kootenay Meadows is an amazing farm, and their attention to the well-being of the cows is next level. They take extra care, and the cows are loved beyond all measure, it is truly beyond heart-warming. Finding the words to explain what I, and most in attendance, were feeling is a bit challenging. There was joy, laughter, and some tears from the crowds. I am swelling with emotion as I am writing this, as most of the cows were elated with joy that far exceeds any words I can conjure up. "They're just useless cows?", some of you might be insisting. Well... they're not useless and certainly not emotionless. I was utterly (pun intended) amazed by the excitement and joy the cows had running, kicking up their heels, frolicking, mooing, and lowing. Such a sight to see! My daughter and I were blessed to have a couple of cows come within a few feet of where we were standing and started lowing (mooing). It was like these darling heifers or cows were saying, "It's about damn time" and "Thank you for experiencing our joy". If you read my blogs consistently, I have a theme, overcoming hate with loving action. I try my best to not judge and give solutions to sometimes very difficult heart issues. This being said, I also understand the "tricks" that come from people in high places, the Controllers. Many people who are trained in the art of deception and lies to control our lives think of us as "useless cattle". These controllers believe that they are better than us commoners. Some of these people even go as far as to think that they are chosen people of God and that they are given the keys by "God" to control our lives. Population control in some circles of influence is also a determining factor in believing what they do. I am not trying to confine any elitist group or individual to a certain system of belief, as this would be presumptuous, but the "I'm better" runs strong in the modern mindset. These people are apathetic to our emotional well being, exuding the emotional characteristics of, well, cattle(?). I now see the irony... The cows got me thinking, is this what we live for, the anticipation of waiting for the gates to open? The small dopamine hits of enjoyment in life, when we get to frolic and kick up our heels in some foreign country or overstuffing our appetite with widgets, gadgets, and gizmos...Oh my. The anticipation of waiting for the gates to open in order to have a happy and fulfilled life seems like a distant dream for many people. If we are given a choice to stay locked in the bondage of what the Bible calls Sodom and Egypt (modern-day slavery), or grazing on better pastures, would we even recognize the difference? Is our whole existence in life waiting for the gates to open? Are we waiting for the magic formula, instead of marveling at being alive? I am perplexed with people who are content with the gates opening and closing for them, who go with the flow, and who never question the gate-keepers. I constantly question whether or not our controllers, the gatekeepers, have our best interest in mind. What kind of fodder are we? Are we feeding the industrial complex, the controllers, the system? Sometimes, like the cows, we spend months (sometimes years) of solitary confinement, and rarely, if ever, do we choose this prison. We struggle to understand the purpose of being in the holding cell of life, but we trudge on trying to find the meaning and/or purpose during this moment in time. For some of us, we don't understand if this confinement is for our safety or a lesson to be learned. Maybe, we are being removed from the storms of life, protected from persecutions of hate and anger, or an unforeseeable accident. We don't understand but we should accept. So, we keep up the façade, day after day, week after week, year after year, waiting for the gates to open. A very good friend of mine, tells me something all the time, I want to pass it on to you, as I believe what he says is true (any similarity to the 70's song is purely coincidence, lol). This is "earth school". Yes, earth school, that's it. What am I learning in earth school? How do others affect me and how do I affect others? Teaching and learning, learning and teaching. The biggest lesson of all is taking care of each other and teaching one another, these are the real keys to a better life. We don't need to wait for the gate-keepers to ensure the better pastures with loving action. It does not matter if we accept or reject solitary confinement. Eventually, the gates swing wide and mooovement is necessary. We can stay behind the gate, remaining in the bondage of past trauma, or the comfort of the feeding troughs. However, for me, I don't want to live in past fear any longer. I am choosing to be the first at the gate. I want to frolic and kick up my heels at the greener pastures that have been promised by a loving God. A promise? Yes, a promise! We have been promised a life everlasting as well as a Paradise Earth. A Paradise Earth, called the New Jerusalem, a place we reside after the Beast is slain. Maybe this is as simple as facing our fears and trusting in God. A spiritual city built for those who believe and trust in the Lord according to the purpose of God. His purpose ("Its" purpose for people who struggle with a masculine conceptualization)? According to the purpose or will of God is this; Love your neighbor as yourself. These attributes are found in the Holy Spirit, which indwells in us. It is a choosing, willing, or deciding the conscious will of God, to do life with full intent of loving one another. When we find the will of God, we enter through the gates of the new city to paradise, or a life everlasting. God is the essence and existence of all creation. God is the Ipsum Esse Subsistens, which is contained within Itself or Himself the whole perfection of esse. Esse is found even in the cattle or cow. Wow... it seems simple when writing how to love and live, it is tougher to put into action. What do we witness in one another, frolicking with joy or wallowing with sorrow? A strange blog this week because of the emotional cows, it is stranger still how life works. Life is allegoric, metaphoric, and parabolic, it is the Esse found in everything. Be like the cattle or the cows, by giving thanks and showing gratitude, with the aptitude of a loving and joyful nature. Until next week... Love always, William John
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  It is Wednesday morning and something in my spirit is telling me that I need to write about forgiveness for this week's blog. I am not sure who this is intended for specifically, if nobody, then I feel that it is a reminder to help put into practice the art of forgiving others. He that covereth a transgression seeketh love; but he that repeateth a matter separateth very friends. Proverbs 17:9 In the passage of scripture above, a covering of a transgression is asking for forgiveness, this is a loving action. It is what follows that is not loving, repeating an offense against someone will cause suspicion and a lack of trust. If someone has been the victim of a repeated crime, a transgression, against them, the words, "I'm sorry", will start to have little effect. The victim will start to build walls, and failure to accept any future behavior in someone that mimics a past transgression against them will be met with disdain. Many of these transgressions may be legitimate, however, in the context of forgiveness, how does one break down barriers that have many of us on a pattern of repeat? How do we distinguish between feelings or a harmful action that requires us to forgive or ask to be forgiven? We have all heard stories of someone who was sexually assaulted or molested at the hands of a family member, fathers with daughters, brothers with sisters, yes, even mothers with sons. Most of us reading this should be appalled by the mere thought of this happening, but it happens. I also need to clarify that this should be seen as a stripping of a potential sacred bond that two people can have when they fall deeply in love. The depravity of a child's innocence, most people will agree, is unforgivable. No punishment seems appropriate, especially for the victims of such an offense. In extreme cases, how does someone forgive a father, who was supposed to protect a child's innocence? Many children who grew up as victims of sexual assault and/or molestation carry an incredible amount of guilt, and have a difficult time trusting in any romantic or intimate setting. It is the elephant in the room in many modern relationships, and without true forgiveness of both ourselves and others, the cycle of failed relationships is preserved. So, what is true forgiveness without true justice? Even if the penalty fits the original crime, does the feeling of guilt of our lost childhood innocence subside? Does the victim now feel an allowance to forgive, rarely!? I am reminded of times when people have confided in me as victims of childhood trauma. When they confronted their abuser later on in life and found a truly repented person standing in front of them, many times the victim relented on their planned revenge or form of justice. When the abuser was ashamed and asked for forgiveness with genuine tears in their eyes, many of the victims found compassion in their hearts to forgive, this was when true healing began. This is astonishing to me, as many people find the road to recovery once they learn to forgive. Even in extreme cases where their childhood innocence was destroyed, there was almost an instant recovery. A huge weight was lifted from their shoulders, which allowed them to walk taller and feel stronger, by gaining a renewed heart full of peace and compassion. Forgiveness is known to break chains, it is truly magical. Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven. Matthew 18:21-22 I believe that this passage is often misused and misunderstood. In contrast to the above example of childhood victims of sexual immorality, this passage is forgiving someone who keeps sinning against you in the context of Jewish law. The Jewish law of Jesus' time stated that you could not take someone to court without asking for forgiveness, and in fact, the victim shares the blame if forgiveness is withheld. By their law, you had to forgive seven times before a person could take someone to court. Let that settle in your mind for just a moment... It was against the law to withhold forgiveness. The Jewish law in modern times has reduced this to three times of forgiveness, similar to "three strikes, you're out" or "three-month grace periods". Jesus states that you are not to take a brother or sister to man's court, ever. We are to be separate from the earthly Talmudic laws established by man. If someone has transgressed against you, the offender must show repentance through mind and deeds. Mind, meaning the offender is sincerely apologetic. Deeds, meaning returning back, typically to someone that you have offended. The deeds or repentance can be simplified as someone returning an object that an offender stole. Obviously, less understood when dealing with the matters of the heart. Asking for forgiveness, or repentance, is an action. It is not praying to God and leaving it at the feet of Jesus to deal with. If we have knowingly offended someone we need to take loving action and ask them for forgiveness. For the victims, Jesus was clear that revenge and/or giving someone their comeuppance is equally as heartless. If we are walking in the spirit of God, then our fruits will be evident, and we will do our best to not transgress against anyone. It is as simple as, "Doing unto others as you would have them do unto you". But wait, this is the problem today, isn't it? I want to make this personal for one moment, as I feel that many of us are struggling in the area of forgiveness, especially in the arena of intimate relationships. In today's modern age, I have missed the mark of keeping above the perceived sins/transgressions that I have been accused of. Many of us who find ourselves single in 2024 have a hard time following the rules, and it is difficult to circumvent all the past relationship walls and red flags that have been formed. Sexual tension has been foolishly called spiritual connection. I have been this fool, and asking for forgiveness after breaking someone's heart seems insincere. I desire, as most of us do, to fulfill the list of conditions that someone feels will take the relationship further into a utopian socially blissful marriage. The truth is for most of us, due to unfulfilled expectations, we fail again. The "I surrender" flags are waived, and apologies are extended. Sometimes the guilt of broken covenants has us in an unforgiving state of mind, mostly for ourselves. I say this because there is a beautiful side to failed relationships, it's learning forgiveness and learning to love. I used to say something to my wife of 20 years, "I do not do or say things to upset you". My intention has never been to hurt someone's feelings, in fact, many times we withhold exposing what our true feelings are because of the discomfort of how it will make someone feel. Should we apologize then for making someone feel bad? I venture to say, Yes! However, in today's day and age, it seems that anything can trigger a negative response resulting in apologies. If the goalpost of expectations keeps changing, it will be impossible to maintain a healthy relationship. High expectations are being projected at an alarming rate, due to the unrealistic Reality TV, Social Media, and so on. High expectations mimic a coveting nature, which is the opposite of a loving nature, this is against the law of God. Learning forgiveness is the path to a more intimate relationship with God, with nature, and with each other. There was no allowance for unforgiveness by keeping someone in bondage to the earthly courts and man's law. Any follower of a loving God would never desire to transgress against a brother or sister. Repentance holds the key to healing a broken heart from any transgression. The renewing of one's heart, mind, and soul is transformed when we accept the teachings of Jesus. It is all about this change in the heart. By the vessel, William John   In the film "What is a Woman" by Matt Walsh, Matt tries to find answers to this age-old question. He discovers that a woman is anybody who claims to be a woman. It is not about what somebody was born with, i.e. penis or vagina, it is a feeling. Further to this discovery, many of the men who are transitioning, need to go to great lengths to look like a woman on the outside, so by everyone's admission a woman looks and feels a certain way. There is no oxymoron, it is just moronic. The people that Matt interviews look like a man on the outside but "claim" they feel like a woman on the inside, not to judge, but it's truly insane! Question: If someone is a woman on the inside, with more estrogen than testosterone, how would they know that they feel like a woman? Who's to know really? Why would they need to take supplements to transition? Well, it turns out that if someone wants to transition into the opposite sex they need to take heavy doses of estragon or testosterone to trick their minds into making them their desired sex (which used to be gender, but this is a whole new topic), not to mention mutilate their bodies. Do "all" women "feel" a certain way inside? I venture to say no, and that all people are different due to culture, religious beliefs, conditioning, and most importantly experiences. It is preposterous to think that someone is not perfectly made, with whatever God gave us. Anybody who thinks that we are not perfectly made means that they are following the schemes of the devil, which is usually for monetary gain at the expense of someone's mental suffering. Lately, I have been challenged with what it is to be a man. What is an example of a man? Homer Simpson? Archie Bunker? Grizzly Adams? Boy George? Donald Trump? The list is long, but rarely, if ever, is our example of a transitioned man to a woman accepted. How is a man supposed to act? How is a man supposed to feel? How is a man supposed to treat a woman (or man)? As I search the internet I am plagued with even more questions. What is a man? Is it the marine or freeing soldier, a fighter or being bolder? From the examples listed in the paragraph above, a man used to live in the wilderness without a wife to love. Men hunted and fished, gathered and wished. What were they wishing for exactly? Maybe a good season, or reason, or legion. It doesn't really matter, as long as they keep to themselves and maintain the box in their mind that they are thinking of nothing. We see the MSM propaganda with men having no soul, no compassion, and a little weak on brains to interfere with their lives roles, and passions. Men are insensitive, or so we've been told, the heartless sucking of one's soul. What is this churning that has me yearning for meaning? It is because I have been too wishy-washy, as I have not held true to my convictions. It is because I have been stripped of my truth, my understanding, my roles and my passions. As a result, I have now been more concerned about hurting somebody's feelings, especially in the arena of intimate relationships. This is not being compassionate, this is a strange attempt to circumvent an argument or avoid a fight, it's rationing it. There is far too much emphasis on positive reinforcement rather than accountable transgressions, soul connection rather than role reflection, and agreement rather than argument. We are all different, even within our God-given temple, this is not equal to a desired sexual orientation, it is so simple. Feeling like a cat, doesn't make me a cat. I am feeling exhausted. I am feeling bored. I am feeling useless. I am feeling hopeless. I am not alone. I was told that I was going through a mid-life crisis about four years ago. While this may be true, I had no desire to find a sexy woman to hang on my arm or buy a new sports car, but instead, I struggled with, "What is the point?" and "What is a man?". It was in the year 2000 when I was so broken I needed to see a psychologist, as I was looking for love in all the wrong places. My psychologist's advice was this, "Make as much money as you can!". So, for years I chased money, but I never felt satisfied that this was the meaning of life. Sure, providing for the family was not only honorable but also biblical. However, was the point of life to just make as much money as you can? Is this really the message I wanted my children to take into life? Is this really the point of being a man? I have always been a dreamer and tried not to be a schemer. I have always wanted to do the right thing, but was shocked to find that the formula to living a successful life and being a real man, in the eyes of the world I must add, relies heavily on one's bank account. I am personally challenged with coming out of a system built on greedy principles rather than Godly ones. Many men I know are plagued with the same questions and feelings of hopelessness. Some men I know have taken things to the extreme, by suppressing thoughts with drugs and/or alcohol, buying sex, or trying to make themselves a woman. I understand the difficulties. How do we stand up to the greed pollution, noise pollution, and all the confusion? Most men I know have the desire to provide for their family, to love and cherish their wife, to create and build a life. There are a few men, built as warriors, who have the desire to take down greedy hands that profit from our suppression. There are a few men, built as hunters, who have the desire to provide regardless of the consequences of our controllers. There are a few men, built as protectors, who have the desire to tell the truth in the face of persecution. These are the men willing to play in the dragon's den when victory seems plausible and not impossible. Hiding behind the cloak of lies is not a good characteristic of a man. It is standing for truth, knowing that you might lose it all. This is a true warrior, a true hunter, and a true provider that men were created to be. Matthew 10:39 KJV - He that findeth his life shall lose it: and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it. With love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control, mixed in with the power of truth! By the vessel, William John   "You cast out demons in the name of Beelzebub!" A charge that was imposed on the Christ named Jesus of Nazarene. It is also a charge that has been imposed on many who are outside the modern institutions of many sectarian organizations, called the church. According to Christian theological studies, Beelzebub is another name for Satan. He is known in demonology as one of the seven deadly demons or seven princes of Hades (Hell). Beelzebub is a representation of greed, gluttony, and envy. This is going to make for a great study for a future blog, but for now, it is just a short framework for understanding. This week, I have been once again victimized by slander, gossip, and misinformation, all in the name of "Love", so I guess this is okay, right? In my blog, Provoked to Anger, I get real about my shortcomings, because guess what, I'm NOT Jesus. I have never claimed to be perfect, in fact, I miss the mark regularly. What am I doing or saying that is causing the Rocking Chair Brigade to have their feathers in a tizzy? Well, lately, I have been scrutinized by some people that I am associating with evil, the dark side, and even so far as to suggest that I am working for the enemy. It's ludicrous really, as I am far from doing any of the aforementioned. Heaven forbid, I even went as far as to have participated in "their" meditation and prayer. From some of the onlookers, I have clearly lost my mind and have been sucked in by demons, or at the very least, demon practices. This is coming from the strong modern-day Pharisee and Sadducee mindset, usually found within Christian sects. As a follower of Jesus and someone who spent 25 years within the various Christian denominations, I am all too familiar with the judgment and finger-pointing that goes on within the various sects. It seems that many Christians are looking for the devil outside of themselves and fail to see their shortcomings. This is the point, projection instead of reflection. It is the devil inside that wants to divide. Who cares what I'm doing? Am I harming anyone? "You are playing in the demonic realm and not telling people the truth about Jesus", I hear the clamoring from the religious right. "Really??" I am constantly checking my heart, and rarely do I get angry, this being said, hanging out with "those" people, the modern-day Samaritans, sure has some in the church concerned that I am teaching a new gospel. I'm exhausted. It seems to me that the Rocking Chair Brigade has nothing better to do than follow me around and try to discredit me as a lunatic, unworthy of the words I write, and unworthy to teach on loving one another. Now I understand what Jesus went through. I blog extensively about finding ways to love rather than hate, to be a good person rather than a jerk, and most of all to look at ourselves before casting judgment on others. In fact, we are not supposed to judge at all, according to the teachings of Christ. There are times when people are doing something that requires judgment, or more appropriate action. Action should be taken in cases where someone is being harmed. We are to go to the perpetrator first and/or bring someone of authority to deal with the harmful actions. Ultimate judgment is reserved for Christ. Gossip which leads people to judge is not of God through whom Jesus was/is manifested, PERIOD! Judge not least ye be judged!!! Hypocrites!!! I could throw around judgment if I wanted, as we are all being watched. Like some leader of a Christian church who is having an open affair, with a woman half his age. Or a Pastor who claims all knowledge of bible scriptures, but fails to tell his congregates that he was taught by a secret society and took oaths of secrecy. The people who make claims to God, and biblical prophecy, only to be proven wrong, but still keep holding their hands out for money for the next false prophecy and/or teaching. The woman who claims to be a Christian, but brings people to court and lies under oath. The list goes on, and as you can tell, I'm more than a bit annoyed. Believe me, when I say this, I dislike being called a Christian, because I see the hypocrisy. The word Christian has been tainted because hypocrites run the show. What a great way to divide people, "don't look at me, look at that guy". The church is in disastrous territory because as more and more truth is revealed, the pews are emptying. The more people like myself "ascend (no better word, sorry church)" from the lies and deception of pulpit teaching, the less profitable the God of this world is. The lies are being exposed at an alarming rate, and we are embarking on a grand awakening like the world has never seen since Jesus Christ walked as a man in the world 2000 (or so we've been told) years ago. For me, this has become very personal. I spent years inside the walls of many Christian churches, studied the bible, and read many important books about God, Jesus, and so on. I heard all the gossip, and what the mainstream Christian church's narrative and understanding of "anything but Jesus" followers were up to. Never once did we take the time to understand why people think the way that they do. After many years of listening to the "heathens" (in which I grew up) outside of the church, I realized something, the heathens, many times, have softer hearts, less judgment, and a desire to tell you to your face when you are being a crappy person. As a Christian, I started to employ an egotistical mindset, which is very unattractive to many seekers of God from outside of the Christian faith. How did this happen? Well, Christ is the only way, which means that being a Christian is the only way. Everyone else on the planet is, well... wrong. I tackle this mindset in An Abomination that Caused Desolation, and it is still difficult to impress upon people that Jesus is saying "his spirit" is the only way. Be like Jesus, most people can get behind this, however, his message has been hijacked by misinformation, lies, deception, and of course hypocrisy. Why would anyone want to follow a guy who would stand with the undesirables, the modern-day Samaritans? Why would anyone want to follow a guy who is only found within the 4 walls of some denominational sect, which is full of hypocrites? I began to come out of her (the churchy world). I began to reflect and learned not to project. I did not want to make this blog about gossip, slander, and misinformation. I was annoyed, but I have now had time to reflect. I have decided to leave this issue alone. I love all the people involved in my weird controversy, I am not here to start a debate on, "who's right or who's wrong" etc. I have personally gone to the people on both sides and am leaving this with God, not Beelzebub. Ultimately God is the one in control, and God knows my heart. Jesus said to the Pharisees and Sadducees (our modern-day denominational gatekeepers), “In what name do you cast out demons?”. You see, Jesus was teaching a new way to follow God. He was pointing people to their hearts, with a renewing of their minds (changing the mindset). Jesus was changing people, by casting out demons, the mindset of greed, gluttony, and envy. The ancient world that Jesus grew up in was hijacked by the very heart that has held society in bondage throughout history, paying alms (offerings) to a God outside of us. Just like today, when you sin (miss the mark) or come short of the laws of this world, you can repent by paying part of your wage to the governing authority. There is huge money to be made off sin (missing the mark). Romans 6:23 "For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord." I refuse to walk in the arena of judgment and finger-pointing. It saddens me that the judgments are coming from ego (I'm better) instead of humbleness (I am no better). I refuse to accept the casting out the demons in the name of greed, gluttony, and envy. I will continue to follow a man named Jesus that taught us to live with the fruits of the spirit, the foundation of love, by the renewing of our mind and a softening of the heart. May we all reflect within ourselves before casting any judgment, enduring to love always. By the vessel, William John. |