Jesus was a Narcissist

​​This week, I have been asked a few questions from old friends and some new ones, such as, “How do we love the unlovable?” These questions are mostly in the context of relationships, so I feel the need to address this more clearly to my readers.

Jesus was all about love, and that meant everyone, Jews and Gentiles, neighbours and enemies. Jesus also told the truth, he knew when to stay silent, and he was provoked to anger. This does not mean everyone gets a free ticket to act and behave anyway they want because they trust and believe in Jesus, there are consequences for our actions towards our partners, and in today's selfish environment it seems to be dire.

Regarding relationships, it is okay to tell the truth even if it hurts someone’s feelings. This does not mean constantly berating your partner into accepting your truth, causing feelings of disrespect. It is best to stay silent so the one you're accusing of your perceived truth isn’t provoked to anger. Sometimes, being silent is the best plan of action so things don’t go off the rails. When someone is provoked to anger, Jesus said, “Don’t sin in your anger”, (whatever that means?), remember, Jesus clearly sinned (came short of the law) when he whipped all the money changers out of the temple.

In 2018 my then-wife told me I was a narcissist, I had heard the term many times before but determined that it was a psychological condition like Bipolar, Schizophrenic, or mentally delusional. I had to look up symptoms and conditions to better understand what I was being accused of. As it turns out, on the self-diagnostic narcissistic scale, I could have traits of a narcissist, but so did my wife. Over the years, the term has been thrown around like a boomerang.  It is frustrating, as nobody seems to be taking action for their crappy behavior. We need to look at the person in the mirror, this is NOT a narcissist trait. The whole point of manipulation for control is to blame and accuse, we are being played by the devil (metaphorical, allegorical, symbolic, or spiritual, you pick). If we are constantly accusing our partner of being mentally deranged, the obvious consequence will be relationship breakdown. Narcissistic traits run deep in everyone, and I see now how the devils are playing us like fools.

​The Bible states that we will be “lovers of self” at the end of times. From the elitist think tanks, the concept was to break down the family unit with matriarchy (women rule), instead of patriarchy (men rule). Amplifying men's and women's traits is the trick to developing new world ideas from think tanks such as Aldus Huxley, Alister Crowley, and Sigmund Freud. To achieve control of the masses, give the public an unquenchable thirst for luxury and possessions. This creates a dopamine-crazed, self-induced seeker of pleasure (selfishness), instead of a patient, kind, longsuffering, patriarch for the betterment of others.

The idea that men are the head of the household was to be seen as toxic and to be viewed with disdain. The reason was, that strong family values, with men in control, are more difficult to infiltrate. Most men when they find their damsel in distress, will work hard (physically) to maintain their family unit, and this does not mean to provide material wealth, although this is often the result. Men want to provide protection, teach values, and will often take a hard line when discipline is necessary. Men’s traits have been amplified to toxic levels, and it was a devilish design, from the Archie Bunker of the 70s to the Homer Simpson of the 90s.  If men feel unappreciated, they seek validation elsewhere. Men often give in to their selfish desires when seeking validation, acceptance, affirmation, and affection, which can lead to cheating or other forms of abuse.

In the same way, women's traits have been amplified. Women traditionally operate on feelings; they connect life with a nurturing nature. When amplified there is no room for masculinity, as the traits of men don’t compliment, they complicate. Women love on a level that is hard for men to understand often missing the mark in emotional connection. Women are also being programmed to watch for red flags, triggered by certain words or toxic masculine traits. This creates communication breakdown, misunderstanding, and abuse (accusations, manipulation, and self-righteous anger).

​The Answer…
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If you are in a relationship, and it is on the rocks, stop everything and pray. For some people this is spending time alone in nature, for others, it is going into a private room and dropping to their knees. The Bible suggests taking time for fasting and praying, but not too long so the devil cannot get a foothold, you can read in 1 Corinthians 7. In today’s environment, it is easy to seek the next dopamine hit of pleasure, and social media does not help to create unity, so it is best to stay off the device while praying and spending time with God (or alone).

If you are separated and there is no room for reconciliation, then thank God. Thank God for past mistakes, the learning years, and life. Take time to reflect on your traits, and how you reacted and responded to relationship struggles. Take time to mourn the loss. Learn to say, “I’m sorry”. Learn to forgive. Learn to be patient and kind. Get rid of things making you stumble so the devil cannot get a foothold.

Reflect on the Golden rule; Do I treat people the way I want to be treated? Or do I treat people in contempt because they don’t recognize the way I want to be treated? (let that sink in…). Learning to love can be difficult, even Jesus had times of frustration and exhaustion, I'm sure modern day Martha's would have seen him as a narcissist. 

By the vessel,
William John

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